The Sultans Are Playing Creole!

I just heard Beyonce’s non-single “Creole”, which has apparently been around for the better part of a year.

It’s a “Half-Breed” for the new millennium! And it’s terrible!

I never ever liked “Crazy In Love” or “Ring The Alarm”, so call me biased, but “Creole” seriously has no redeeming value. We haven’t heard Beyonce do any intricate singing (like scatting) since her Destiny’s Child days. In “Creole,” skill has gone out the window: it’s all screaming.

Why does her shouting get a pass? We don’t pretend Nelly Furtado is much of a singer; she and Timba don’t ask us to pretend, either. So if Beyonce isn’t going to do any real singing on three subsequent singles, why should we pretend she can still sing? Prove it, woman!

And the worst part? When Beyonce says:

All my red bones get on the floor!

I have only one mental image.

It’s spring, people. Yet thanks to Beyonce, I’m now dreaming of a very baritone White Christmas.