URGH! A Music Blog

Hello Teacher Tell Me What’s My Lesson

Posted in Dance,Jan Wayne,Music Reviews by M on October 28, 2005

Hey, remember that cover of “Mad World” by Tears for Fears from the end of Donnie Darko? Did it make you want to kill yourself, too? Well put down that razor; you’re doing it wrong, anyway! Jan Wayne says listen up!

Jan Wayne

Congratulations, Jan, for covering “Mad World” and taking the piss out of that lugubrious movie remake. As goofy as your song is, it’s more true to the Tears for Fears version than the one by…Gary Jules? Who the hell is that?

“Jan Wayne! Turn those turntables!”

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Schiller As A Second Language

Posted in Dance,Downloads,Music Reviews,Schiller by M on October 27, 2005

Illegal downloading pays off again!

Jette von Roth and Schiller

You can’t buy Schiller’s new album Tag und Nacht until tomorrow! And even then you have to be in Germany! I only got a hold of “I Feel You” from Schiller’s last album three months ago; it might take years for a legit “Day and Night” to hit our shores. As Americans it’s your patriotic duty to steal this music.

I haven’t yet heard the whole album; the standout track so far is “What’s Coming” with vocalist Jette von Roth. Her lusciously blissed out vocal style is very close to Tiff Lacey’s in songs like ATB’s “Ecstasy”.

Von Roth has a zonky advantage over Lacey, though: she’s a non-native English speaker! Like any good trance song, “What’s Coming” is filled with nonsense lyrics that don’t fit the melody; add von Roth’s vocals and the trippy gets even trippier. Good work!

I love you Schiller!

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Please, think of the Eurodance

Posted in Dance,Music Reviews,Pop by M on October 26, 2005

Sally Struthers

I’m Sally Struthers.

For every Paul Oakenfold there are thousands of struggling dance producers who lack the technical skill to produce a competent dance track. That’s why, for just pennies a day, you can help struggling Eurocheese artists like Bikini Girl and their song “Touch My Bikini”.

Bikini Girl - Touch My Bikini

Bikini Girl and other artists are forced to use synthesizers from 1996, and use vocal artists that sound like a lobotomized Milky. In this song the group even steals a riff from Donna Summer’s “I Feel Love”—like so many bands before them.

There are thousands of acts just like Bikini Girl starving for a decent hit. And you can make a difference. Please, think of the Eurodance.

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Free Market Music

Posted in Dance by M on October 22, 2005

The Thrillseekers CD Single for $99.99 on Amazon.com

A three track single for $99.99?!?!  What?!

Does it come with a blowjob?  Maybe these Amazon people have a side project, and this is how they throw off the vice squad.

Or maybe not.  iTunes is selling each track for $33.33.  I can get two Frampton Comes Alive albums for that!

But not the blowjob. 

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I’m so mashed up.

Posted in Dance by M on October 21, 2005

Senor iTunes tells me that i have 57 songs, 5 hours, and 444 MB of music that is one artist “vs” another.

Over an hour of that is “Owner of a Lonely Heart”. Stupid Max Graham vs Yes!

But none of it is Pearljam.

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Bananas, Melonas

Posted in Dance,Günther,Music Videos by M on October 18, 2005

Holy shit!

A naked man jumps into the air in the video for Günther's Tutti Frutti Summer Love

Anybody else catch this full frontal male nudity in the video for Günther’s “Tutti Frutti Summer Love”?

Quite frankly, I’m offended. “The Ding Dong Song” video promised us roomfuls of oiled, naked girls, but the only real nudity we saw was Günther’s own backside. And in “Touch Me” he failed to get Samantha Fox naked like we’ve been trying to do since we were 13. Now there’s even less T&A and the most tra-la-la we’ve seen yet. Thumbs down!

PS: Mine’s bigger.

Greece 2000

Posted in Dance by M on October 17, 2005

iTunes: That’s it, M. Stop playing “Greece 2000” over and over again.

M: Even the DJ Shog remix?

iTunes: Especially the DJ Shog remix. You only have two songs by Three Drives on a Vinyl and I’m sick of them.

M: Fine….


M: I’m back from my car trip!

iTunes: M, I saw you through the window. You sat in the driveway for three hours listening to that song on CD.

M: Crap!

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Scooter vs Depeche

Posted in Dance,Depeche Mode,Music Reviews,Scooter by M on October 16, 2005

HP Baxxter from Scooter vs The angel from Depeche Mode's Precious single

Scooter, now celebrating their eleventh year of goofy techno cover tunes, has a pretty catchy single in “Hello! (Good To Be Back)”. In fact I though the chanting male chorus wouldn’t be out of place on an album by the twice-as-old Depeche Mode.

But who is really being sampled by Scooter? Read the fine print:

Music and lyrics by Glitter, Leander

Yikes! It’s Gary Glitter!

So be careful. There’s only a thin line of good taste separating “Personal Jesus” from “Rock and Roll Part 2”.

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Laura Braniganagain!

Posted in Dance,Laura Branigan,Music Videos by M on October 16, 2005

Laura Branigan?

Holy Undead Eighties Stars!

Is that really Laura Branigan in the video for Royal Gigolos cover of “Self Control”?!

Our dear Ms. Branigan died over a year ago. Does it really take that long for the Gigolos to rip her off? Somehow I doubt rival hacks the Vinylshakerz spend years contemplating their Wham! covers.

Or maybe they delayed release of “Self Control” with respect for the recently deceased. Because you wouldn’t want to squeeze that cheese over a fresh grave.

Trance Masters

Posted in Dance,Downloads by M on October 15, 2005

I stand in the shallow end of the deep ocean of trance music, but one of my favorite downloads is an unmixed compilation album called Trance Masters. It features name brand artists (Paul van Dyk, Armin van Buuren, and my sentimental favorites, Three Drives on a Vinyl) and quite a few crossover hits.

But what I did not know is that the download I have is just disc one of a three disc compilation. Wow!

It’s an import, but at $20 for three discs the price is right. This is just the latest example of copyright violation paying off for everybody.

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