Because you demand it, three comments about the Uncle Kracker sexual assault arrest:
- Isn’t it gilding the lily to identify the man as a “former deejay for Kid Rock“? I’d say one-hit wonder for “Follow Me” is more timely and just as indicative.
- Isn’t $5 million a lot for bail? I’ve read a lot of gay Law & Order fanfiction, and even murder trials top out at around $2 million.
- Since when did CBS News become The Smoking Gun? Can we go one week without a celebrity mugshot?
Yankee great Phil Rizzuto is dead!
Now who will narrate Meatloaf‘s attempts to get laid?
Wait just one second: there’s a band named Warhammer 48K???
Like the world’s nerdiest RPG?
The one-man violin band called Final Fantasy is just as ill-named, with or without cloud pooing. Final Fantasy isn’t just one of the most popular video game series of all time, it also has a dedicated musical following. There are sellout concerts with full orchestras in Japan and the US featuring music from the games. What this means: Owen Pallet will not be greeted by screaming Japanese girls if he ever plays live at Budokan.
Can we please stop naming our musical projects after the video games we played in childhood? Unless it’s Princess Tomato in the Salad Kingdom.
Well, I liked it.
Prince is a touchy guy, but he laughed at his Chappelle Show sendup. And he let Tony M drink his girl’s bathwater. I’d be willing to believe Prince enjoys the ridiculous side of lovemaking.
Ben Marwood of the website Drowned in Sound makes the big mistake!
More people than I expected went mentally crazy-bonkers for Leslie Feist’s latest album, The Reminder, but despite my best efforts to like it, it just sounded to me like the same song over and over.
It’s true! A few weeks ago you couldn’t get close to Feist’s new album without jumping into a raging waterfall of saliva pouring from the mouths of her eager fans. I’m only a thirty-second-snippet listener of The Reminder. What I heard was acceptable, but it won’t cure cancer.
I’ll repeat: Feist can’t cure cancer. That was a dangerous statement a few weeks ago—fans were just that blindly devoted, melting down copies of the album and ingesting them as a miracle remedy. Any suggestion that it was just good music was unacceptable.
Why do we need an “it-girl” in music, anyway? I understand the appeal of celebrity, but the amount of effort being put into this constellation of female musicianship (with Bjork at the center of the universe) is ever so slightly demeaning and really does take away from the music.
Now, of course, The Village Voice is trying to make us believe the new it-girl is M.I.A.. Pass.
Anyway, the Cult of Feist is still strong enough to arrive, claws-out, for a a battle in the comments:
ANGRY FAN: Are you really saying that “My Moon My Man”, “The Water”, and “Honey Honey” all sound the same?
MARWOOD: I wouldn’t know song titles. I listened to it three times and swapped it for Live It Out.
Yeah, Metric beats Feist! Why is it I have a problem with genuinely overdedicated fans, but not with blatantly manufactured Canadian indie rock chick rivalries? I suppose I just prefer violence to saliva.
As part of my mandatory indie rock education, I went on a Decemberists downloading spree!
Most of my selections were live tracks. And while I didn’t expect the band to appeal to me, I was having trouble figuring out how the band could appeal to anyone. The Decemberists barely seemed to be a band at all. Nearly every track featured lead singer Colin Meloy belting his preposterous lyrics over top of the Braveheart soundtrack—it was nothing but orchestra!
Luckily I’m not the only one who identified The James Horner Band as a concern. Greg Kot of the Chicago Tribune writes a spot-on assessment of their live performance:
The Decemberists have gradually recognized over four albums that they’re not just a precocious little vehicle for Meloy’s cleverly constructed songs, but a rock band. Yet when the orchestra roared, bassist Nate Query, guitarist Chris Funk and keyboardist Jenny Conlee were swallowed up by the wall of sound, and it essentially became the Meloy-with-strings show. Only drummer John Moen was able to make his presence felt.
This would be forgivable if the orchestra was any good. Instead the arrangements are derivative from film scores, and even the few curveballs thrown into the orchestration come across more like John Barry’s James Bond stings. To match that The Decemberists would need to add a steel guitar riff.
My live cut of “The Perfect Crime #2” gave the orchestra a break, allowing the band to show some playfulness and a little bit of rhythm. There’s a pulse there! The Decemberists should check it more often.
The Cribs have emerged as one of the less annoying examples of sibling rock with their single “Men’s Needs”. It’s a fun little song, but most of the attention they’ve gotten in the past few weeks is for the fully nude woman in their video.
So for their new song, how can veteran rock darlings Rilo Kiley top that? Fill their video with actual porn stars.
Unlike the crybaby commenters at Brooklyn Vegan, I’m not so worried about what “The Moneymaker” portends for Jenny and the boys. Sure, the song has none of the warmth we know Rilo Kiley has in their repertoire, but it’s hardly as cold or monotonous as it’s made out to be.
You want to know what is monotonous? Banal, life-story interviews with porn stars that last longer than the song itself. They aren’t interesting. They aren’t attractive. They’re not naked, either. We see more skin from the considerably more luscious Jenny Lewis, and that’s really just because of a slightly higher hemline.
Boys, you’ve already got a beautiful woman in your videos; you don’t need to resort to Lebowski-esque porn parody. At least you didn’t go the full route of erotic desperation and change your name to The Hooters…
It’s the tenth anniversary of Radiohead‘s OK Computer, the album that brought sonic weirdness to the MTV audience. That’s right, it’s been ten years since Thom Yorke first called out for the assistance of the Karma Police—and he hasn’t stopped wailing since!
To celebrate this diamond anniversary, hip music sites are celebrating! Hypeful has collected their favorite covers of the album’s songs and created their own OK Computer tribute. Stereogum has taken this a step further, releasing a full-fledged tribute album called OKX. Stereogum’s collection is just a little bit better for one reason: it doesn’t have Howie Day.
And what if you don’t like Radiohead or an assortment of upstarts butchering their venerable work? Just count your blessings; it’s the tenth anniversary of another album, too….
Forget about that fake Zep Reunion!
URGH has the next best thing: the exclusive musings of Robert Plant, filtered through the exciting “Web 2.0” website Twitter!
Yes, thanks to modern technology, you can have the peerless, mystic insights of Led Zeppelin all at one address, instant messaged to you, or even sent to your cell phone!
Even if you don’t take advantage of all that the 21st Century has to offer, you have to admit: Plant is at least as amusing and necessary as Fake Steven Wright.