URGH! A Music Blog


Timbaland Behind The Scenes

Posted in Dr. Dre,Hip-Hop,Justin Timberlake,M.I.A.,Missy Elliott,Timbaland by M on April 13, 2007

[NOTE: Our URGH! stealth team has uncovered the following IM conversation, revealing the secret evil of the new Timbaland album. Beware!]

Timbaland Timba
Shock Value is pretty good so far. But I want to make it more challenging.

Timbaland Timba
And by challenging, I mean “bad.”

Timbaland Timba
What can I do? Any ideas?

Justin Timberlake Justified
Add you going “YEAH!” to every track, like you did for “Sexyback”.

Timbaland Timba
Eh…

Justin Timberlake Justified
Add ME going “YEAH!” too! And make people drink every time we say it!

Timbaland Timba
That’s good for starters. But how about this track “Bounce”? Let’s give it some bad lyrics. STUPID lyrics.

Timbaland Timba
I’ll start it off poorly.
LEMME SEE THEM BIG TITTIES!

Missy Elliott Missy
LOL classy!

Timbaland Timba
So Dre?

Dr. Dre Dre
What up, dog?

Timbaland Timba
You have a bad lyric? How about something needlessly racist?

Dr. Dre Dre
Yeah, I got one.

Dr. Dre Dre
BLACK AND CHINESE LIKE SUM YUNG HO.

Missy Elliott Missy
LOL

Dr. Dre Dre
I GOT A BUNGALOW.

Timbaland Timba
Perfect.

Dr. Dre Dre
PANTY ANTHEM.

Timbaland Timba
That’s enough.

Missy Elliott Missy
I know what people don’t want to hear about: my body parts!

Justin Timberlake Justified
Oh no!

Missy Elliott Missy
MMM HMM
BIG OL BUTT!
THICK LEGS
BIG OL JUGS!

Timbaland Timba
YEAH!

M.I.A. M.I.A.
SIDEKICK RINGS
WHASSUP? HOLLA!
TEXT THE ADDRESS
I’LL SEE YOU LATA!
BABY COME DOWN!

Timbaland Timba
Damnit, M.I.A., you’re not on this track!

M.I.A. M.I.A.
COME DOWN COME DOWN COME DOWN!

M.I.A. M.I.A.
RUN DOWN RUN DOWN RUN DOWN!

M.I.A. M.I.A.
RUN-DUCKA RUN-DUCKA RUN-DUCKA
RUN-DUCKA RUN-DUCKA RUN-DUCKA
RUN DOWN!

Justin Timberlake Justified
Damn girl!

Timbaland Timba
M.I.A., get out of here!

M.I.A. M.I.A.
DUN-DUDDA-DUN-DUDDA-DUN-DUDDA-DUN-DUN!
DUN-DUDDA-DUN-DUDDA-DUN-DUDDA-DUN-DUN!
BEAT GOES ON!

Timbaland Timba
That’s it—your song is OFF the album! Now it’s only a bonus track!

Missy Elliott Missy
Why does that girl sing about texting so much, anyway?

Justin Timberlake Justified
Cause she’s Asian.

Missy Elliott Missy
LOL

Dr. Dre Dre
Like Sum Yung Ho!

Timbaland Timba
Back to business: Justin, we need a chorus. Something about bouncing.

Timbaland Timba
Something with an awful mental image.

Missy Elliott Missy
Like crotch rot.

Timbaland Timba
But with bouncing.

Justin Timberlake Justified
OK how about this?

Timbaland Timba
Bounce!

Justin Timberlake Justified
LIKE YOUR ASS HAD THE HICCUPS!

Timbaland Timba
Bounce!

Justin Timberlake Justified
LIKE WE WAS RIDIN IN MY PICK-UP!

Timbaland Timba
YEAH!

Dr. Dre Dre
Damn!

Justin Timberlake Justified
MENAGE A TROIS! MENAGE A TROIS!

Timbaland Timba
OK Justin.

Justin Timberlake Justified
MENAGE A TROIS! MENAGE A TROIS!

Timbaland Timba
Settle down.

Justin Timberlake Justified
Sorry.

Timbaland Timba
Not until you’re older.

Bonus Information: This astute track-by-track review of Shock Value by Byron Crawford. It’s like he read my mind!

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Oh Timbaland!

Posted in Hip-Hop,Timbaland by M on April 12, 2007

OK, I’m six tracks into the new Timbaland album Shock Value, and there’s not a single “freakyfreaky!” or “baby girl uh” to be found. That alone heralds a new direction for Mr. Thomas, last name Crown.

More to come, particularly about the track “Bounce”. “Like your ass had the hiccups!”?!?!?!? Justin, no!

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